The Whirlwind Named Eleven
In his Senate Judiciary Committee testimony, accused sexual-assault perpetrator and soon-to-be Supreme Court Associate Justice Brett Kavanaugh quoted The Book of Hosea when he warned that if America “sowed the wind,” it would surely “reap the whirlwind.”
Apparently, he’s finally stumbled his oft-drunk-and-belligerent ass into telling the truth about something. There is a whirlwind coming. The first blow will land in early November of 2018, and it will continue for many, many years.
That whirlwind’s name is Eleven.
Eleven Justices on the Supreme Court is now the only acceptable response to the ratfucking of democracy pulled off in the past ten years by the Rapepublican Party.
Eleven Justices on the Supreme Court is the number required to obviate the votes of Neil Gorsuch — a man whose seat rightly belongs to Merrick Garland — and Brett Kavanaugh, who in this newly conceived configuration of the bench would be forced to sit behind a new female justice, selected not just for her juisprudicial wisdom, but also because she is a survivor of sexual abuse, risen to the height of her power despite the machinations of a revolting old-boy network of despicable old men.
Eleven Justices on the Supreme Court is the new target for Progressives, so that the voter-suppressing, gerrymandering, dark-money-ingesting, active-measures-by-a-hostile-foreign-power supporting, race-baiting, child-caging, pussy-grabbing, slut-shaming party of monsters isn’t rewarded for their subversion of the people’s will any fucking more.
Eleven Justices on the Supreme Court is a completely legal, and a completely proper response to the way one political party has rigged the game for so long. All it would take is an act of Congress and the signature of the President. Step one happens in five weeks. Step two? Depends on the speed of Robert Mueller’s investigation, doesn’t it?
Eleven Justices on the Supreme Court is a fine solution to our current problem. There is no need to impeach Justice Kavanaugh or Gorsuch. That would be both a long and more technically difficult process. Also, it would remove the exquisite pleasure of watching their votes canceled out time after time after time by women now empowered to tell them, finally and absolutely, NO!
Eleven Justices on the Supreme Court is the necessary response, because at long fucking last we Progressives, Liberals, and even otherwise-lily-livered centrist Democrats need to acknowledge that this is a war, and the way you get the other side to stop beating on you is by punching them repeatedly in the throat.
Politically, of course.
I’m all for returning to regular order — the kind that our country operated imperfectly under for most of the past few centuries — but not until we get payback for at least a handful of the Rapepublican’s dirty tricks. And you know what, I’ll even go back to calling them Republicans, but only after they stop saying “DemocRAT Party.” Maybe that’s petty, but now you’ll know that we also have attention to detail. Moreover, fuck that shit. They’ve been getting away with the DemocRAT Party for far too long. Now we’ve got a comeback. Consider this the template for how we move forward from here, snowflakes.
Our first demand is to have payback for the two Supreme Court seats you stole — and, yes, you stole them. The first through Mitch McConnell’s bullshit machinations at the end of Obama’s second term, and the other by ramming through Kavanaugh’s nomination over the protest of howling women who felt victimized by your abuse of all rules of propriety and proper investigation, simply because you could.
Until then, until we get Eleven Supreme Court Justices, expect to be held down and forced to do shit you don’t like. Every. Single. Chance. We. Get.
The whirlwind is coming. Maybe you better just lay back and enjoy it.
Michael Tallon is an independent writer from Upstate New York who lives in Antigua, Guatemala. He is currently working on a nonfiction book detailing his experiences with a rare genetic disorder than nearly cost him his life in 2015. Follow him at Twitter.com/MichaelXTallon.
